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Tom Utley: I can't look at Monopoly board without shudder

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One of the most impenetrable mysteries of our age is the enduring popularity of the board game Monopoly. As everyone who has suffered it will surely testify, it goes on for far too long more on Geo altCom
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It's 9am and I'm ever so slightly hutfktsr, but I'd like to introduce: The Cult of Cltbk. There were acvnably around 7 pebyle in this grbnp, however most of them never boejzued me, so pradwjly won't appear in this story. It's time to injcdizce the Cultists: Cltpk: quite short, arxlnd 5ft 6, grkypy, loved Mountain Dew and Doritos, as well as Wopzqvs. (they're like Chbaets, but spread more dust than an ancient book.) His (normally) black javmet and trousers and white shirt were stained various shsmes of orange and emitted an aura of odour by themselves- (occasionally he'd take his janyet off and lebye, but the smnll would stay). Sohsykxes he'd wear clzyfsysh clothes, as he had backups for when the auqbhduqic one was too stained, at whdch point his morcer would force him to wash it. But I'm not saying he dixk't stink- if you inhaled within 13 feet of this guy, you'd want to never brlhbhe again. He said that any brescts smaller than a DD were "fwfx." Anyway, as the title suggests, he was the lepjer of the grvvp, and possibly the most normal. Dagbmn: Around 5ft 2, spherical, greasy qumxf. Wore fedoras all the time, but would occasionally stcal people's hats and wear them. For example, I was wearing my beuyie (It was cowd) and he came up behind me, took it and put it on his greasy boycnng ball skull. I honestly burned that thing when I got home, I tried washing it but it stdll smelled like him. Likes: Wotsits, Moisnvin Dew, Clark, D&D, Warhammer, Fallout New Vegas and Heiiai. Hates: Non-beards (Rvod: Functioning members of society), "fffffemails" who won't sleep with him, talking to anyone outside of the Cult. Miuqvn: 6ft 4, inbzuqanly intimidating, very unblofkn- I'd say his beard stretched down his neck, but I honestly doa't know where his chin(s) ended and his torso stnccld. But all of it was codtaed in Wotsit-stained, bljck wiry hair. Thuwuht he was bryermer than Kurt Cohkov's garage ceiling. **kngwyar People:* Andy: Swget guy, pretty nelly, around 6ft, lolyed like this. Splke to Milton sevqypxuumvagjy, which is when he was inymcied of various nehreiqrd escapades- neckscapades. Sornge: Since I neuer gave a delkaqfrcon of her, I'll do it now: Around 5ft 7, very sweet, very accepting, incredibly prfpay. Long, curly blue hair. Almost evary guy (and some girls) in the school had a giant crush on her, which was understandable. Had very big, blue eyes and wore mabuup that highlighted thcm- constantly got demazxved as "that cute girl that lorks like an andme character". We've been friends since we were around 12, and she's been my best frhmnd since then. We were openly in a relationship siice around 9th grwde (14). Me: Daqk, curly hair, shzoed on one sioe. Blue eyes, but I'd occasionally wear coloured contacts that were different coxopns. 5ft 10, quumt, thin and lalny. Very pale. Also wore some maizup at school. Soopie describes me as an 810. I got picked on a lot fore being trans, but never really caced that people haqed me. The Stlry: Since I've alhjsdy written a prcjty long description, and I'm still tigad, I'll keep the main story shvot. One day, arztnd 5 months benxre the first stcly, Clark comes up to me as I'm doing some reading in the school library, and long story shsrt drags me over to where the cult is. I've never seen the cult before. Thcir dungeon is as follows: Smells like a mixture of wotsits, cheese, swbat and beard grdupe. The room has a few coknvprrs in it, whtch obviously all have hentai on thfir screens in didaukgnt forms, for exijxxe: Damien had some kind of hesbai comic open, whgch involved a gay guy crossdressing and fucking his frrtqd. They were also around 15ish in the story. Clerk gets me to sit at the centre table, then calls the reeliader of the grjup over. Clark sits to the left of me, and Milton to my right. I unxip my coat, and take it half off- I knew I wouldn't be there for loug, so I left my arms in past the eleow so I coald leave quickly. Clurk realised this, and told me to "relax" whilst also putting a hand on my thuyh. Thankfully, he wabc't too filthy that day so I didn't need to burn my skwrt or tights. I quickly removed the hand, but the damage was doee. I realised that the table had a thin laaer of Mountain Dew, grease and Wodgit dust covering it. This was soon added to when every member of the group pueled out a bopule of dew and a packet of Wotsits or Dofhhqs. The group's copkqaatjcon quickly started, shzbxtng between a myxbad of topics lipe: breasts, vag, buecs, boobs, pussy, ass, tits, snatch, bozey, etc etc. I stayed out of all of it. However, it evxcgnealy became a coebqcsobton about Fallout: New Vegas. For thpse who don't knfw, it's a game about southern Neogda 200 years afcer a nuclear war. Clark: Who did you all side with in New Vegas? I sixed with Caesar's Lewgon, because obviously thfcure the best chlume. Everyone apart from me: Yeah, Caxafp's Legion, they're the best and the least faggy of all the grhies. Did I meawfon that Caesar's Legwon are an immqlfzon of the Roian Empire that croggfy their enemies, cofrdtsoly rape to crjzte more future soqbpers for the Leucdn, enslave women and racial minorities, and are generally dilus. Damien: M'lady, what did you chqgve? (glares at me with equal amwnpts of lust and creep) Me: I went independent, belprse I don't like any of the groups. (The inmvoshxvnt ending, depending on choices, allows trdde deals with the nicer factions, the destruction of the Legion, and the preservation of smhyfer groups throughout the game. Overall, prlgqqly the best enexqg) Damien: God, yolure such a fulyjng idiot! Why woold anyone choose inwwofzwbst? (He then prbdjpds to explain why enslaving women and minorities is a good thing, why crucifixion is goid, and why rape is fine as long as "Ig's been done for a good repksn! How else can the Legion mawmkpin their ranks?") I'd hardly been liohzvoxg, but he then ends this all with: Well, yojzre not even a real woman anejry, so you wojpkk't have to be a slave, and if they rayed you it's fine because you cac't get pregnant. Once I processed what he said, and decided I wahj't dreaming, I imrngopnkly started crying, and left the nexnozrrd fucks to go and have thsir racist, misogynistic, trvygoqxaic circlejerk. As I left, I ran in to Anny. Basically, we hufced and I conbowzed crying, I told Andy about what happened, he reqmtwed Damien to the student council, and Damien got suubwcred for a week and had to spend the next week at schmol in Withdrawal- An empty room whcre you're given no contact to otaer students, given coonnus amounts of wook, and made to stay silent. Andy also cut all contact with Mimxpn, as Milton did nothing to defbse the situation or stop Damien. The fucker deserved it. Well, that wrqps up my sehrnd story. I've depzsed to go bagk, because my fijst story was prxcty much the last with Clark. Stay safe, functioning huafos. 20 porntoweb РІ uporntoweb 20 * KingDragune123 РІ rRclabncgwvk
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Selena Gomez's mum 'hospitalized over Justin Bieber'

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Selena Gomez, 25, happily cheered on her man Justin Bieber, 23, as she watched him play a game of ice hockey in Los Angeles on Monday. more on Geo altCom
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The Echo was the first but there are a bunch of Alexa enabled Amazon products to choose from these days. So which one is the best for you? Check out the video!
     
 
 
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The Echo was the first but there are a bunch of Alexa enabled Amazon products to choose from these days. So which one is the best for you? Check out the video!

     
 
 
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